Artistic Flirting

You probably wouldn't be reading this if your mother hadn't deployed a Type III glance in your father's direction sometime you were born. That's right. A Type III, known as a "fixed gaze" in the parlance of the lab, is just one of the 52 gestures women use to attract men - gestures that have been coded and catalogued by Monica Moore, Ph.D., a psychologist at Webster University in St. Louis, who has studied flirting for more than 15 years.

Dr. Moore found that while men often make the more overt maneuver in courtship - what social scientists call "the approach" - it's women who send out the initial invitation by smiling, patting their hair or licking their lips. Even though these may be unconscious gestures, flirting is the cornerstone of the population growth.

After two decades of staking out single bars, campus libraries and malls, Moore is convinced that regardless of age, race or class, women signal and keep men's attention with a finite number of movements. To give you an idea of how flirting might work, I've pieced together a few of Moore's observations. It's a mating ritual that is guaranteed to get him out of his chair and over to your table. Maybe even onto the dance floor.

1. Start with a Type I glance. It's a generalized introduction to your movement. You simply "scope out" the room until you see someone you like.

2. Now that that you've founf him, focus on him with a bout of Type II or "short, darting" glances in his general direction. Gradually work some smiles in.

3. If you're talking with a friend, stay animated. Primp a little. Touch your clothes even if they don't need adjusting. Toss your head, run your fingers through your hair and do some hair flips.

4. If he still doesn't approach, "parade" past him on the way to the restroom or jukebox. On your way back to your chair, throw him a glance.

5. Back at your seat, give him more direct stares. If there's music, move your body to the beat. If that doesn't get him, he's probably married: try another guy.

(Condensed from Self by Mary Talbot)

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